By Dacia Nichol VIA Rated (R) My
I’ve been a printer, an inventor, and a writer, among a multitude of other things. The country I live in has finally listened to my advice, wise man that I am, and has penned a declaration of independence from Britain. Next, they’re going to send me to France to get some help. This is going to be the beginning of a very long journey and what’s worse, my son has taken the side of these damn redcoats. This will be historical, but there’s just one problem: I’ve already lost nearly all of my hair! So much for any flattering portraits. #FML